difficult terrain

i've been having some dreams lately with very simular themes. swamps, desserts, rainforests, landmines. sometimes i walk, sometimes i hike, sometimes i fly. but one thing that always stays the same is that i am navigating difficult terrain.
i'm not complaining or anything. dont get me wrong, i'm more than aware that that's just what life is all about. and lets be honest here, in the last few months i've had quite a few challenges to navigate my way through. some are fairly normal and some have lead to some major life changes.
i've been feeling pretty good about it all on the whole lately (including the usual peaks and troughs). i'm thinking that this might be a new chapter for me. discovering new things about myself, enjoying different aspects of life, seeking more.

right now I'm sitting in a teeeny internet cafe in north hobart. i'll be here for the next few days. just taking some time to unwind - something i havent done for quite some time now. at the moment i'm still battling some impatient/bored tendencies but i'll squish them all too soon i'm sure. ..either that or kara's house will be VERY clean when i leave.

I'm also realising a few dependencies I have on various: substances, people and websites. who woulda thought?!?

logical argument

omg!

for those of you who dont know yet "i can has cheezburger" is the best site in the entire world! you can find all sorts of amazing gold like this one.

Kitties

saturday night fever

so i finally watched it. for years i was told that it was a classic to go through the ages, at the peak of john travolta's career, he sets dancing milestones and inspires millions.

What the FuCK!!? this film made me want to vomit. i had very little or no empathy for any of the characters and the date-rape/pack-rape stuff was disgusting. the way that the film framed it - casualised it - is highly offensive and sickening. was there a point to it? i dont think so.

this is not a film that i will be revisiting. even the dancing wasnt exactly brilliance ..well, nothing that cant be captured in a youtube clip.

still travelling

so, i'm aware that my previous post about melbourne was terribly whingy (or may have come across that way). i think what i was trying to express my change in perspective and maybe a change in taste as well.
i've been making different choices lately in the sorts of stuff that i do. i'm much less satisfied with a nite at home on the couch etc. and find that the urge to be out on the town come more and more frequently.
what does melbourne have afterall? an excellent variety of well priced and decent resturaunts. a massive bar-scene. theatre. sports. theatresports (hehe). comedy. art. opera. shopping. photography. film/cinemas. parks. ...that's only the stuff that i can think of right now. but someone recently said "whatever you can think of Melbourne has it!"
so for me to feel happy about living in melbourne it would be fitting to take advantage of all the things around me while i'm here.
that probably would involve not spending all my time on facebook but you get the idea. more experiences, less stuff. i can live like i'm travelling in melbourne.

in the meantime the savings are stacking up and i'm still figuring out where the next destination might be. india, bali, egypt, turkey, france, sweden(again), italy, fiji, USA..

peachie teachie

i'm on teaching rounds at the moment. i'm learning all that i can about teaching. it's such a strange thing to spend the whole year learning theories and concepts about teaching and only put it into practice for a few fleeting weeks that rush by like crazy. but i'm really enjoying it. i've been practicing giving clear instructions, explaining concepts and generally working with all sorts of different learners. i've been working on my classroom management strategies as well. positive reinforcement is my preferred approach but i also need to show consistently where my boundries are when students push me. and refining many other skills which seem to already be apparent in my personality. things that i've noticed seem to consistent across All teachers:
-being a control freak (gotta be bossy*)
-loving the sound of their own voice (cause they talk all day long)
-being super organised, this is where neuroticism is a necessity ..but coming from the girl who loves labelling arranging things in order (spices, stock, books, cds you name it!) i dont think that will be too much of a stretch.
the thing that makes me wonder is how this will affect my lifestyle when i'm doing this as a full time gig. i mean just in the last week i've totally readjusted my style of speech etc etc. and i'm not just talking about while i'm at work, there's many teachers that i know that are not like that in their own time (and many that are). which category will i fall into?


*not really like kelis but i do sometimes hum that as my theme song with a bit of shoulder action.

melbourne DOES rock -really!

so i'm back home and back in the swing of things (so to speak- not much on the swinging front that's for sure!). i'm back at work, i'm back at uni, i'm back at home with my parents.
i had such a wonderful time overseas and now it's over. i'm feeling mildly depressed about it. i guess i was looking forward to it for so long and now it's over and there's nothing ahead to look forward to. plus i guess i wasnt as aware of how dull my life can be before being confronted by so many exciting experiences. i was content with everything i had before - and now nothing seems to make the cut.
my lack of motivation is reflected most in how behind i am at uni. sigh.
what were all the reasons why i loved melbourne? i just cant remember now.
melbourne isnt exactly at it's prime with this nasty winter chill!

i keep seeing all these international/exchange students around campus and envy them - i wish i were on exchange. i'm not sure if i'd even care where. infact i would probably love melbourne again if i were on exchange here (hypothetically speaking ofcourse). is this what it's like to be bitten by the travel bug?

in other news, i recently purchased myself a second hand lappy from a friend who wanted to upgrade. this is the first computer that i have ever officially owned all to myself. how exciting!! i'm not sure what this will mean for my online/blogging regularity but it's certainly opened up a whole heap of possibilities.

there are less bunnies in my life now. my household became bunnie-less while i was away. i dont have any commemorative photos right now so i might post one later.

i'm also proud to say, now that the bigbrother season is over, i managed to bypass the whole thing ENTIRELY this year. that's one less viewer they can put on their polls. ..but what's with the other channels just giving in and not bothering to show any decent shows to compete? tv sucks anyway. especially now that i've got access to internet-tv! yay! scrubs season 5 here i come!!

home, safe and sound

just got off my 30 hour trip home. feeling surprisingly awake.

dont really have time to post a huge amount now but Smoothy's been off to a good start and has even started filling his gallery (have a look here). i promise there are stacks of nice stories and pictures to come. you'll just have to bare with me, and cope with this in the mean time:

tramping around the globe

well, it´s the end of the second week on my AMAZZZZING european tour.
i´ve been having an absolute ball. just ducked into a little net cafe off the main plaza in Barthelona to check the important stuff. time is tight though, so only a few words to let you know that i´m still alive and well.
the first whole week was very difficult for me due to jet lag and certain disgestion issues associated with the time readjustment. but it was totally sereal to catch up and hang out with some of my dearest friends and catch a glipse of their lives all the way in the UK.
london didnt do much to improve my tan but spain is certainly the ticket. we´ve been eating well, sleeping well and just generally enjoying the sights.

yesterday we went down the coast and enjoyed the beach. we have 2 more days left in barcelona before we head off to sweden.

Smoothy has been posting alittle more than me. have a look here

xxC.

i'm not that tough

i'm not THAT tough. i didnt sleep a wink last nite.

this week could possibly go down in the record books. i'm ready for it to be over.

i'm so tough!

what would you do if you were at work minding your own business just doing your job - all alone - when three crazed loonies with machetes come in and held you up and stole all the money out of the till whilst making threats about your personal safety?

you'd probably be pretty scared. you might consider giving them a karate kick to the chest. or pull out some bad 80's dance moves to potentially scare them away. you might try to call someone. and you might do nothing.

either way a robbery is a robbery -and the truth to THIS story is much simpler and less interesting. there was only one loonie, no weapon and no threats. not much was taken. i'm fine, just a little shaken.

..but that's cause i'm so tough!!

studi-licious!

*studi-licious, so delicious. i'm like a study robot, 'bot!*

"so how are things going?"
"oh ok."
"what have you been doing?"
"working my ass off. just study."
"yeah and what else?"
"what do you mean 'what else'? when am i meant to do that?"
..dont ask me about anything else! there is nothing else!

i'm getting to know my study really well, my eyes get to do alot of reading, my hands get to do alot of writing, my brain does alot of thinking. that's pretty much it.
i am totally one dimensional.
i'm studi-licious!

chase this down.

my favourite show on tv at the moment is "the Chaser's war on everything" - check out their website here.
why do i love it?
- is it the childish humour?
- the social comment?
- the excessively handsome presenters?
who knows! but it's very enjoyable. for those of you whom dont get to view it on australian tv there are clips on the website to view and enjoy at your leisure.

1click

i thought it was soo GOOD that it deserved a break in my blogging drought.

look here

it's not caffine.

now i've done it. i broke the cardinal rule. no clips before bedtime. they're just too exciting for that time of nite. ham says they have a 'no computers' after dinner rule in their household. i cant comprehend of such a thing. if i wasnt online last nite i never would've gotten to chat to some far away friends and organise some overseas-exciting-trip-stuff.
besides i was only on there for a second, just long enough to put a few finishing touches on my blog layout. the clips just found themselves on my screen, i barely even touched them. i swear, my intentions were good- i just got caught up. i mean did you know there was ANOTHER ulhs in the past year? geesh, i'm out of the loop. and look at how todd and naomi's musicality has developed in the past year! do they do all their own choreography? what was their inspiration? and why did they choose THAT song?
i think next time perhaps some self moderation could be applied to this particularly stimulating medium.
man, i'm buzzed up! and it's way worse than that time i was on crack!

Peaches

about 6 months ago a particular song caught my ear on the radio. i found it interesting because of the provocative lyrics in stark contrast to the style of the music. at first glance is quite feminine sounding with a simple beat-vocal relationship. the lyrics are about going down. but not in the typical mtv/christina aguilira ho style, it's very assertive and about meeting HER sexual demands rather than playing on HIS fantasy. it's so refreshing, i love it. it's called Downtown by Peaches. you can listen to it on her website.

i've just discovered this website and am having a bit of a gander at the other stuff she does. it's kinda empowering and interesting. i love that she's all sleezy just like the culture we are surrounded by everyday(guys objectifying gals) but a complete gender dynamic swap (she objectifies boys).

the music is kinda 80's keyboard inspired. most of the vocals are kinda monotone. and the modern rhythms mean it can get a bit repetitive. some songs suck- but you cant win em all. i reckon the context you choose to listen would need to be particular to fully appreciate her work.

after recently discovering that pj harvey is about 10 years older than i thought, i'm feeling mildly unsure if i've completely missed the boat on this one as well.

online discussions

i will preface this entry with the fact that i DO realise how long it has been since i have posted and that my blog and the many dedicated readers have every right to feel neglected. i apologise.

it's not easy being in such high demand, you know. i can't do everything. ..as much as i'd like to. and i actually think that i've done quite well to blog AT ALL in the last 12 months considering that i've not really been at a computer on a regular basis and it was actually quite inconvenient. ..right now i'm back at uni and feel like i have even LESS time but i am on or near a computer just about everyday. and i suspect taht this will give me more opportunity to blog.
i'm also using my brain alot more (well.. that's the idea anyway) so, in theory, i should be even more stimulated and inspired to dish out some blogging-gems.


okay,
the thing that i actually wanted to address and talk about actually was more to do with online discussions.
as you may know i have, for many years now, been (in some form or another) a member of an online swing dancing discussion board*. this was probably my first experience at online forums and has been one that i have at times both loved and hated. and i cannot make any such claims about such things across the board even if i have dabbled in other forums as well**.

recently for uni i have been required to participate in a weekly discussion for one of my subjects. where basically you answer particular prompts (topics) listed by the lecturer based on the weeks readings/lecture etc. which will eventually contribute to our next assignment and our overall mark.
i suspect that this is more of a sneaky way of getting students to actually do the readings before the tutes than anything deeper and more meaningful. perhaps the department is going through an experimental stage and doesnt really know how what to expect. perhaps they figured they were improving our IT skills -another curriculum requirement ticked off.
what is actually happening is quite forced*** and shallow. all 35 students want to meet the assessment criteria, not rock the boat too much and probably have a hectic schedule. i know i dont read every single other post before mine (maybe 2 or 8 if i've got time) and pretty much write my response before hand including gaps in which to insert names "I agree with _____, who states.."
blah blah blah.

but the other nite when i did have time found that i actually slipped into a certain role while considering my response. i wanted to write something concise and insightful, but not too insightful and certainly not controversial. i realised that that is exactly what i have done in other forum situations as well = i am a fence-sitter! GAH! what has happened?
..i wonder if this is the reason why i dont post on the dance forum anymore?
either:
-i dont care about the topic and dont bother posting
-or i care too much and cant bare to post.

so, now one of my subjects is requiring me to undertake an online tutorial next week. i'm just reading the instructions now and they are going to assess everyone's posts as either thoughtful or not thoughtful. that's tough. surely, there's something to be said about original material: usually there are only a couple of different sides of the story or angles and if they've already been contributed then how can i make a meaningful contribute to the discussion without repeating what other people have already said? and doesnt that go against the concept of a discussion? it's not meant to be a gathering of people shouting out about who's side they're on.

that's where blogging comes in. it's only one voice -shouting as loud as it wants.





*i know, i know, i havent' actually read it for at least 2 months. you heard it here first folks.
**a pop music forum - where they discuss in detail the personal lives of the artists, lyrical meaning and an opportunity to engage in a very watered down version of internet-sex. the other was a subculture related board that consisted of 2-dozen teens slandering each other and dropping personal jokes - hardly intelligent discussion.
***this notion is stupid and following me. recently i felt like this at both a dance event and a social event. who is actually doing the forcing? (apart from the present situation obviously)

bbq savant

is it possible? a bbq savant would be a fine title for a girl that gets left outside regularly doing one of the shitty jobs in the kitchen hierarchy.

soon my human fingers will drop off and my tongs will grow and develop into fine impliments of steel perfection. i will become the bbq-girl. my skin would become heat proof and i could store cooked food in my armpits to keep them warm untill serving time.

and i would eat nothing but sausages, cutlets and rump.

my hair would be like the husks of corn and my eyes the colour of charcoaled bacon crisps.

i'm hungry..